Act 2, Scene 34: “Driving Down Property Values”

TRL’s neighbor turned his driveway into a runway.

The first snowfall of the season blankets SB in three inches of fluffy white stuff. The leaves have barely been taken care of and now it’s time to shovel snow. TRL and S find the whole nature maintenance thing annoying.

We have better things to do with our time than rake and shovel, she tells a friend over the phone.

TRL normally agrees, but he actually looks forward to shoveling. It is the only exercise he gets anymore, and there is something extremely satisfying about doing the job and surveying your work. And it doesn’t involve the major annoyance of raking, which is bagging the leaves after raking them up and then taking them to the dump. With shoveling, in time the snow disappears all by itself.

TRL heads out into the dark night and begins shoveling.

Across the street he spies N.

Hey, he calls out.

Hi, responds N.

N has his car hatch open. TRL goes over to chat, one man out in the cold night making his driveway safe for his wife and kids to another.

What are those poles? He asks N.

To shove in the ground along the driveway so the plow stays on the pavement, he responds.

The guy who is plowing our driveways? TRL asks, referring to the double deal N had made with a local kid to plow both of their driveways in heavy snowfall.

Yup.

Are you really going to put them in, kind of trailer trashy, don’t you think?

A plow isn’t very friendly to grass, responds N.

TRL shrugs and goes back to his side of the street.

The next morning, bringing C & E downstairs, TRL catches a glimpse of N’s driveway. Sure enough, bright orange poles surround it, ending in a single pole with a large red reflector like an artificial flower in front of the garage.

Great, mutters TRL, he won’t have the plow carve up his lawn but small planes may start to land in his driveway. And, TRL can’t help think, that if S and TRL decide to move and sell the house they would have to do it in the spring time, when the poles get pulled up. The garish markers probably bring property values down.