Act 2, Scene 31: “Not That There’s Anything Wrong With That”

At some point, all fathers of sons face the same question in reaction to a child’s behavior: does it indicate that he is gay? Now if the father is gay, then perhaps it is asked with hope and pride. And if the father isn’t gay, no matter how liberal and open and unrepressed he is, he will not be thrilled with the prospect. Not because there is anything wrong with it. But because a father wants his son to be like him: to share in his interests, which extend to sports, or hobbies, or world viewpoint, and girls. To be able to get to the age when he can share a beer with his son at a bar, he can put his arm over his shoulders and he can say Look at the hooters on that one. It’s a heterosexual guy thing.

Now C has worried TRL a bit. He is so sweet and really takes care of E. When E is thirsty, C will share his water. When E falls, C will come up and hug E. These are wonderful things, and TRL is proud of C for being like that. But is C being too sweet? Too, well, maternal? TRL is aware that it is his own bias and neurosis and projections that he is dealing with, but the emotions are real nonetheless.

So when TRL and S go over to a friends house and E plays merrily with their 4 year-old daughter but C takes no interest in her, this worries TRL. But what really scares him is bath time. TRL walks into the bathroom as S is bathing C and E. E is on his belly, fake swimming. C is sitting on top of the drain, a big smile on his face.

He likes having his butt over the drain, says S.

Fuck, mutters TRL. Does this indicate that he is gay?

Not that there is anything wrong with that.