Act 4, Scene 18: “Coxsackie Anyone?”

TRL walks into daycare with C & E.

“Good morning C and E,” says their teacher Miss Betty.

And to TRL: “There has been a Coxsackie virus exposure.”

“Huh?” says TRL, who has not yet had his coffee and who has been driving behind school buses for the last 30 minutes. Has he just entered the Hot Zone?

“Coxsackie,” she repeats. “Hand and foot disease.”

Now TRL feels like a missionary entering some remote jungle station.

“They may get a fever, and white patches on their tongue and hands.”

“What?” exclaims TRL, hanging up C and E’s jackets as they run off to play with paints.

And then he sees a handwritten note above the sign-in sheet: “There has been a Coxsackie Virus exposure.”

“Who’s started this?” TRL peppers the teacher. He wants the dirty disease vector identified. And an explanation as to why his or her parents' could be so unclean and inconsiderate as to expose the whole school.

“Well, ahh,” she stammers, “once symptoms start it’s not contagious. So we don’t know, but it’s going around. But it only lasts for a few days.”

“Going around,” simmers TRL, who picks up a container of Purell he notices on a shelf and gives it a good squeeze to cover his hands.

“They may get a slight fever,” adds the teacher.

TRL growls. “What dirty little bugger has infested us all. Errrrrr.”

“Where’s Maya?” asks C. Maya is the boys' best friend at school.

“Yes, where is Maya?” says TRL.

“She’s out,” mutters the teacher.

TRL kisses and hugs the boys. Maya, dirty little Typhoid Maya, he mutters as he swings through the doors into the sunshine. “Grrrrr.”