Act 2, Scene 2: “Munchausen in Reverse”

TRL and S take C and E for their 18 month “wellness” checkup. A weigh-in, height check, and some vaccinations, essentially.

The nurse practioner declares the boys healthy engaged toddlers, except.

Except that while they grew an inch each since their last visit, their weight has not increased. And while she isn’t worried, she wants to see some poundage put on by the next visit in 6 weeks. She suggests putting lots of butter in food, feeding them rich cheeses and protein-packed peanut butter. It feels like she is a wrestling coach extolling calories to high school wrestlers needing to make a weight class.

Now, TRL is very emotional when it comes to his children, and he takes this goal to heart. It is his as well as theirs. It is Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy in Reverse.

So when they got home, the boys are placed in their highchairs for some snacks. And TRL has coffee ice cream.

Later that evening, after the boys finish their massive buffet dinner – pastas and strawberries and cheeses and broccoli and turkey and apples spread before them – TRL tucks into a bag of cheese doodles.

Every time he sees his boys around food, he stifles an urge to say “Eat, eat.” He has become his Jewish grandmother.