Act 2, Scene 1: “Smooth”

Over to Frank’s for a haircut. Ten minute wait. TRL thumbs through the crappy three month old magazines. US Weekly, the generic version of Cheese Doodles to People’s Cheetos. Poor, poor Jennifer. Bad, bad Jude. We are truly social creatures locked into our solitary bodies, otherwise why read this stuff at all, thinks TRL as he happily reads the stuff.

You’re next, beckons Frank.

He sits in the chair as Frank sweeps up. Frank then takes his position behind TRL with a razor.

I just took two Advil, didn’t sleep well last night, says Frank.

Oh, why? TRL politely inquires.

Too much going on inside, answers Frank, and he taps TRL on the side of the head.

I’m a headcase, he adds.

Oh, TRL replies, reminding himself not to nod his head as he is being shaved and also not to delve too deeply into the psyche of the man holding the blade.

Yeah, the doctor gave me an Ambien but said to use it only when I really need to. I take a half, puts me right out, great stuff.

Terrific.

Yeah, but last night I opened the window, and it was noisy. The highway is right under the bedroom and the cars were zooming all night. Usually I have the central air on, but it was cool out last night so I thought I’d open the window. Then I never got up to close it. Thought I would eventually fall asleep, you know? Never did. Short enough on the top?

TRL examines his head. Yup, looks good.

The sides OK?

TRL runs his hands over the sides of his head: smooth.

Perfect.

Good.

Frank puts down the electric razor and unfolds a stainless steel straight edge. He foams the back of TRL’s neck.

I just have too much going on sometimes, just can’t stop thinking, says Frank as he scraps over TRL’s skin.

TRL doesn’t reply. The person holding the straight edge deserves all of the attention.

Nice?

TRL looks in the mirror at Frank as he folds up the straight edge. Then he looks at his head, dragging a hand through the back. The short hair spikes against his palm, like a beaver or mink, imagines TRL.

Nice.

Take a lollipop, says Frank.

TRL reaches into the large plastic jar.

Raspberry is the best, announces Frank. It’s what the kids love. Makes their tongues purple.

TRL nods as he examines a chocolate one that would not do. He reaches back in.

I get these things for a dime a dozen.

Literally?

Each one maybe costs a penny. I buy them at BJs in the big bags. You can only get assorted though, so I called the company and asked if I could get just raspberry. They said sure, but I would have to pay up front. Cost me $300 dollars, but I got a box with thousands, all raspberry. It lasted for years.

Frank reaches into a shoe box near the cash register and from it tosses TRL a lollipop.

Here’s where I keep all the raspberries that are left.

TRL nods, unsheathes it and pops it into his mouth.

Frank pops one into his mouth.

They nod at each other.

Have a good day, Frank calls out as TRL heads for the door.