Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Act 6, Scene 9: “Tastes Like… Ass Chicken”


"Yum yum, you are so delicious, I need to eat you up," TRL says to C, and then begins to play bite him. C giggles.

"In fact, your butt is so delicious, I need to eat that, too."

"What does my butt taste like?" asks C.

TRL pauses. "Well, like chicken. Everything tastes like chicken. So what we have here..." TRL squeezes C's butt, "is ass chicken. Yum."

"Ass chicken, ass chicken," C gleefully sings.

E joins in, until a chorus of "Ass chicken" fills the living room.

Act 6, Scene 8: “Ouchy”


E bounces off the bed and lands on his chin on the floor. Bleeding and bruising ensue, but no stitches.

C runs into Andrew J. during gym time at daycare, bleeding ensues. But no lasting harm.

TRL's muscles are tight and his brain is tired. He's only bleeding on the inside.

S falls on her face on the sidewalk between meetings at work, bleeding ensues. She is shaken and stirred, but cognitively understands she is not a martini, so no lasting damage.

Fortune cookie investment machine says: buy Band-Aid stock.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Act 6, Scene 7: “The Little Things Writ Large”


E and C sit on the couch, reading. TRL finishes cleaning up breakfast.

E kicks C.

And kicks him again. C asks him to stop.

E kicks C.

TRL: “E! Stop kicking your brother.”

TRL returns to washing the dishes. C returns to reading a book.

TRL turns to see E's foot kicking again at his brother.

TRL is not a morning person. He doesn't want to be awake in the morning. If he has to be awake, he doesn't want to talk to anybody. He certainly doesn't want to have his blood pressure climbing as he washes the dishes in preparation to get the guys ready for the day in preparation to march them down the stairs in preparation to load them in the car in preparation to drive them to daycare in preparation to get them out of the car and into daycare and into their classrooms in preparation to driving back home to park the car to get on the T to walk to work to... begin the work day.

So TRL seizes E from over the couch, surprising him and lifting him into the air with one arm. E is then transported to a time-out on the stairs.

“You do not kick your brother, and you need to listen to me,” says TRL. He then walks away to finish the dishes as E wails in sorrow/anger/regret/merely pissed that he has a time-out.

Three minutes later, E is spoken to again about why he received the time-out, and he is repatriated with society.

TRL's morning is that much more unbalanced, but he does feel a small sense of pleasure at being able, still, to strike from on high and bring justice to an almost-four-year-old. Does TRL have a God complex? No, TRL is God.